Today I am a little weepy and beautifully overwhelmed.
[i'm ok. i promise. just keep reading.]
This morning I picked up a grande soy chai and parked my car next to the lake near my house to watch the sunrise colors reflect on the water. Rarely do I get up and out of my house to see those morning hues (I’m usually settled comfortably in my big chair instead), but today I was brought to the water early in the morning humbled and in awe.
Let me tell you, Jesus is capable of literally anything.
The sun’s rising and the earth’s turning make for some pretty spectacular colors and bring the reminder that God’s faithfulness is so huge and so consistent and so Good and so beautiful. The colors that danced on the surface of the lake were the same ones that lit up the sky, and I sat there, sipping my chai, reminded that only God can do something this spectacularly beautiful… and only He can do it consistently enough that it is a daily occurrence.
It reminded me of my friend’s parents, married for decades and suddenly on the brink of divorce, who have recently found their ways back to each other. This didn’t happen by small circumstance, or simply because they missed one another, but because one of the two battled in prayer for the things that were unseen, because our battle isn’t against flesh and blood. Only Jesus can do this.
And let me simply say this, if you are looking in the face of someone that you are having a difficult time with, remind yourself that your battle isn’t with them. It’s with the unseen—the grips of the enemy, the influence of sin, the chaos that comes when people choose selfishness, whether your own or someone else’s. Your primary role is to take authority in the battle on your knees. After all, you have the authority of the blood of Jesus. Start to pray with the authority that He has already given to you, and I can tell you that things will shift.
It reminded me of a young girl who simply got caught up in the wrong crowd and began to make some not-fantastic choices, who is now stepping into full-on freedom and joy in Christ. Only Jesus can do this.
It reminded me of my own marriage—the highs and the lows, the heartaches and disappointments, the losses we walked through and the communities we had to leave—and I’m stunned to see the beauty of where we are right now.
Yesterday we celebrated 2000 days of marriage—TWO THOUSAND DAYS. I’ve never done ANYTHING consistently for 2000 days in a row except for breathing, so I’m pretty sure this is a big accomplishment. I woke up early yesterday and made a simple sign to celebrate with balloons strewn everywhere on the ground (Thor the dog loved the balloons until he popped one and it fully freaked him out). When Aaron got out of bed and came out to the living room I had our song playing—the one that played when I walked down the sandy beach aisle to him on our wedding day.
When he walked in the room, I was overwhelmed with emotion (read: prego. but also real emotions. but also prego me.). 2000 days. We made it. Through the hell, through the joy, through the moving, the various jobs, the losses and gains, the pain and the happy, we made it. Aaron hugged me and I cried. We have always loved each other, every day, but it has been a difficult journey with various life-circumstance-bumps along the way.
And now, here we are, 2001 days in, and we have a squirrely baby boy coming in a mere 8 weeks (insert blue gasping emoji here) and I cannot handle what God is capable even after the darkest night. Only Jesus could do this.
Only Jesus can make a sunrise shine in the sky and on the water like that.
Only God can bring dead things to life and call things that are not as though they are. (Rom. 4:17) That is the norm for Him. We call it a miracle that He can turn things around, but this is what He is used to doing. This is what He is best at.
Only He can do this.
If you are beginning to feel despair, hopelessness, or fear, get on your knees and pray. It might take a day, it might take a week, a month, four months, or two years, but He is in the business of making all things new.
Only He can do this.